Jan 12, 2011

IPL 4 Teams - An Analysis...

So the much awaited IPL 4 auction is over and we now have given a new look to all the teams, lot of shuffling has happened, folks who were once opponents are now teammates, on the whole it’s a brand new season and an action packet tournament is guaranteed. Here are my comments and review of each and every team, of course it is going to be short and crisp.



Royal Challengers Bangalore - Like how they are not willing to release Cauvery Water, they are not ready to release Virat Kholi from their team, yes that guy is in super form but he is not consistent. Mohammed Kaif is a surprise pick, may be Mr. Mallya wud have been in heavily drunk, and he would have asked "Hey are we picking Kaif?" and his obedient employees have gone ahead and purchased "Mohammed Kaif", but in truth he would have meant "Katrina Kaif". On the whole this team has lost its sheen, and they are not a solid team this season.

Strengths: Zaheer, Dilshan, Vettori
Weakness: Rest of the team and No Katrina Kaif

Team Kochi: Once again they proved the fact that Mallu's wanted to do every business that exist in this world, but without investing brain power. I wonder if this is a "Bowling Academy" selection or a team to play IPL. They have selected 10 foreign players and 5 Indian players, but unfortunately a team can play only with 4 foreign players in a match, so in that theory, they are running short of one player to play the game itself. Probably they may color B. Mcullum with weatish paint, remove his shoulder tattoo, ask him to grow more hair on the head, put him a "Kondai" and make him wear a "Mundu" and fool the selectors as if he is an INDIAN player. SHIT of a team with no thinking gone into the selection process.

Strengths: Swami Ayappan, and Guruvaayoorappan
Weakness: The whole team and no glamour power, may be Shakila can help them out here.

Team Pune: These guys have done a lot of homework before coming to the auction, a very good balanced side but I won't say they are match winners, they can fight till the end. But my question here is, how come Thackrey's allowed the team not to be named as "Marathi Manoos" ? Something is fishy here, maybe they are also a part of the shareholding committee. A nice first attempt by this team, and we have to see the results to validate this selection.

Strengths: Yuvraj Singh, Angelo Mathews, Wayne Parnell, Jerome Taylor
Weakness: Yuvraj's captaincy and his ego.

Kings XI Punjab: This team is a batting battery battalion, on their day, this team can trash more than 200 in an innings. Priety Zinta's selection criteria is simple, before pressing the buy button all she need to take care is these 3 points - Will this guy be good to hug?, Is he cute? Will Wadia get pissed off if I hug him?, if the answer is YES to all the 3 questions, he is a sure selection in that team. I would say that the team is more balanced this year than the previous seasons.

Strengths: Batting Power and Adam Gilchrist's cricketing brain.
Weakness: No quality bowling attack, Priety Zinda's resolution of not to hug any player.

Kolkata Knight Riders: This is one team which has totally transformed form a "Good-for-nothing" team to a "Unbeatable-team" this season, SRK has done his homework and he has taken this business more seriously this time than the previous seasons. Though he masterminded the exit of the "Prince of Kolkata", I would say that it is indeed a brave move. It is a very well balanced team and would be a hard nut to crack this time. SRK does not need to pay money and bring his battalion of OLD stars to draw the crowd, this time his team can prove in action

Strengths: Ghambir, Yusuf Pathan, Kallis, Bret Lee
Weakness: SRK visiting the grounds and kissing all viewers, Ghambir's constipated look on his face. Fragile batting line-up, once broken, it’s all over.

Chennai Super Kings: Chennai is a very conservative city, they have proved it once again in this auction, they never went for bigger names, as they are yet to pay the loan they took when hiring Dhoni last time. Albie Morkel would have agreed to buy few 1000 tons of cement from them, hence they are forced to retain him, otherwise no use in retaining him. Bravo is a great pick , he is a very handy player. This team would cement a SF berth as it is owned by a cement company. Good team, but heavily depended on few performers.

Strengths: Dhoni's luck, Bravo, Hike Hussey, M Vijay
Weakness: No glamour power, Joginder Sharma (Dhoni's gay partner), Pathetic Bowling attack

Deccan Chargers: Have picked few top men who are in top form this season but the scene may be different after the WC is over, there may be injuries and walk-offs. In the last season, this team was nick named as "Paper tigers" but this time, I would not say so, they are a very ordinary team. This is what will happen if you continue to give a newspaper for Re 1, you always end up in loss. Nothing great about this side, and they do not seem to be of a bigger threat this time.

Strengths: Gayathri Reddy (If she continues to come in cute modern dress), Kevin Peitersen, Steyn
Weakness: Lack of experience, No depth in batting, Gayathri Reddy not coming for the games.

Delhi Dare Devils: One man army, if Shewag fails, the team fails, did a few brain less purchases. May be Shewag owes Irfan a lot of money as he borrowed a lot for his hair-fall treatment, like the hair, the money too went away, in order to pay that money back he convinced the owner to buy Pathan, that money is terribly wasted. Ajit Agarkar is another surprise pick who is not even fit to play a tennis ball match. Highly confused team selection has screwed it big time.

Strengths: Shewag the injured horse and James Hopes
Weakness: Fragile Batting and Bowling line-up

Mumbai Indians: This is a real team of tigers, not just that we have our GOD leading this side, but the kind of players Nita Ambani has bought, and it’s terrific it’s a quality side with a balanced batting and bowling attack, they are the front-runners for me in this edition of IPL, and I will be surprised if they lose. Harsha Boghle has used his cricketing brains to its maximum and guided the team in recruiting the perfect mix. Nitu Ambani may have to knock few floors in her new apartment for the kind of money she has paid for Pollard.

Strengths: The whole side ....
Weakness: Mrs. Ambani scaring the crowd by coming in jeans and t-shirt

Rajasthan Royals: As usually they are the underdogs this season as well, their selection process is more like T.Rajender talking in English, no one can understand, they have picked up few good men, but on a given day they can dig their own grave, or can build a huge castle. Shane Warne would be the key, he still has the fire in him to win matches, and he is a very good motivator as well. Shilpa Shetty would bore them to death by repeatedly playing her YOGA videos, and rub the players so badly by kissing Raj Kundra every time a player hits a six or a four. We have to wait and watch how these folks perform under Warne.

Strengths: Warne, Watson, Collingwood
Weakness: Un-predictable, Self-Destructive

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