Jul 6, 2010

Married ...

After a short two week vacation for my marriage, I am back to work and as well to blogging. I got an answer to why folks have restricted to just one marriage (officially) in our society, it is so bloody taxing and it drains out every bit of energy an individual has. The oldies in the family actually bear the brunt of all these hungama, though they are mentally charged up to do things and participate in the proceedings; their physical stamina is not cooperating with them. I myself got physically and mentally exhausted in those three days and was waiting to get to home and vacate the marriage hall. Hindu tam-Brahms marriage rituals are pretty lengthy and elaborate and it would for sure test your stamina to the extent possible, starting from making you not to eat anything till you tie the knot to drying your tear glands in that hot, irritating smoke that comes out of the "homam" (fire), it is very very challenging.


I now have the rights to disagree with every astrologer and every soothsayer who asked me and my family to do humpty number of things just for me to get married, I was hell bent in not doing any of those prescribed "parihaarams" (not sure what is the equivalent term for this in english) and proved everyone wrong that even without doing all these when the "right time" comes, no one can stop the inevitable, I am not suspecting the skill or the caliber of those astrologers here, all I am trying to say is, there is nothing superior in this world than GOD and let’s not try to please him by doing all those silly things. I would recommend my readers who are single, not to get carried away by the predictions of astrologers and lose hope or blindly follow all the "parihaarams" he or she says, no one in this world can predict anything, I am not a believer of astrology, to me, folks who believe in astrology are folks who don't believe themselves. I hate horoscopes as well, but unfortunately our previous generation is too obsessed with that and I cannot change their mindset in a day, but for sure, my kid will not have a horoscope written, I am pretty firm in doing that.

Marriage went on really fine and I am simply moved by the presence of my near and dear ones at this memorable moment of my life, I thank all my friends who could make it for the show and also the folks who wished me their wishes via voice and text. I am never a person who likes to be in the limelight, but on this particular occasion there is no choice but to be in the limelight, the still photographer at one stage got on to my nerves when he asked me and my wife to give all funny poses and we both strongly refused to that. The general tam-brahm rituals for a marriage are very funny in the first place and I have to painfully sit through all those, to top the chart of the most silly and stupid ritual is the "nalangu" where the bride and the bridegroom would be asked to roll the coconut, break pappads on the head, drop a ring in a bucket of water and taking it out, etc etc, I was embarrassed to the core and to add to my embarrassment, they all forced me to sing a song :(. Another embarrassing moment came when the entire family asked me to feed my wify a sweet, though we both resisted to the extent possible, finally the families won.

Marriage is a whale of a change to a girl than to a guy, though I am not saying something the world does not know but it gives me a different feel to see that happen in front of my eyes. My wife has left all her near and dear ones just for me and to live a life with me, if I have to put myself in her shoes; I am not sure how I would react to such a situation. It also means that I should be a highly balance person and keep in mind the likes and dislikes of my partner and not to take one-sided decisions and expect my partner to agree. I am so glued to my family and they in turn are glued to me, so I should strike a fine balance in a way, I make sure that my family does not feel that I have "changed" after marriage, as well as my wife does not feel that I am too "centered" towards my family and give her a damn, I know this is going to be a challenge and I will have to be very sensitive about this.

Anyways, all the hungama is over and now I am back to my routine self, my wify is getting settled in this new place and hope she like this new environment. Life is full of compromises and adjustments and I hope we both would be able to do that with ease, but I am not too greedy to pray for a peaceful life, I know issues and fights are bound to happen, but how fast we both get out of that and come back to normalcy matters the most. With lots of hope and faith on GOD, I am starting this new life, so please wish me and my family good luck

11 SAID FROM THE HEART:

ignas said...

hey sat..........wish you a wonderful married life! just seeing that you are ready for all the little surprises that life may throw at you, i wud say, is a good beginning!!
Hope you both are able to balance each other and accept each other with lots of love and respect!!!
a huge dose of understanding from both will help always!!!
ALL THE BEST!!

Satish N said...

Comment by Sangi

hey sat..........wish you a wonderful married life! just seeing that you are ready for all the little surprises that life may throw at you, i wud say, is a good beginning!!
Hope you both are able to balance each other and accept each other with lots of love and respect!!!
a huge dose of understanding from both will help always!!!
ALL THE BEST!!

Ratzzz said...

boohoo.. i dont even have a mention... given how i played a vital role in ur wedding :|

po maama, un pechi kaa... :(

(¯`•._.•[Raajii]•._.•´¯) said...

ah marriage indeed changes life but it could be for the best :-).

Congratulations!

Vidya said...

Congratulations and Wish you a happy married life!

jayscribbles said...

Congrats Sat and welcome to the world of wedded-bliss !
Nice speaking to you yesterday...

P.S am a self-confessed-obsessive blogger like u, a common trait didn't know we had...tcare!

Dr Roshan R said...

congrats man.. glad u followed ur heart.. the 'parihaarams' is a part and parcel of our South Indian culture I guess.. same things going on here

Satish N said...

@All - Thanks a bunch for all the wishes guys. I hope everything happens for good. Love you all ...

Thyagarajan said...

Hi Sata me and chitappa are very happy u have similar thoughts as we have.
We always wish u and our daughter-in-law the best life possible.
Uma

Krishna said...

Hi Sat

Congrats on your happy wedded bliss!

KK

aparna iyer said...

fantastic on your take on parihaarams!
Cheers, and wish you a very happy married life! :-)

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